Sometime at the end of the year last year, I admitted to my husband that WLS was occupying a corner of my mind. I'd always said that that I would do it on my own, that I could get my ass in gear and I would exercise and eat the right foods and I'd change my life forever.
I spent a year and a half attending Weight Watchers and tracking Points and for the first 9 months, things went great. I lost 30 pounds, 10 % of my body weight. And then I promptly started putting it back on. Eight months later I had gained back 10 of the 30 pounds and then I quit to finish planning my wedding.
My wedding was a beautiful day. I looked and felt gorgeous, my husband thought I was beautiful, and I have never felt so loved. After the wedding, I slacked off immensely, until I finally got fed up and went back to Weight Watchers. Once I got back there, I discovered I'd gained back another 10 pounds. It took me 6 weeks to lose 5 pounds.
And then one Sunday morning, sitting in my meeting (which I reall did like...good people, great leader) after having gained back 4 of those 5 pounds because of some serious stress eating, I found myself so miserable that I promptly came home and told my husband I was not dieting ny more because it makes me miserable.
And it does. Dieting makes me miserable because I'm bad at it. I know what I'm supposed to eat, I know how much I'm supposed to eat. But I'll eat the good stuf AND the bad stuff, and I have no off switch. I can gorge myself on pasta or toast or cereal or fruit or whatever it is that peaks my interest, and even when I fill sick to my stomach, I will eat that one last bite. Or five.
So this month I realized that it's time for a new tool. I need something that is going to be my off switch, something drastic. Something that will keep me from ending up in the same situation as mt mom....57 with joint problems, heart problems, cholesterol problems, blood pressure problems, etc. And so I'm going to pursue weight loss surgery, a laprascopic Roux-en-Y to be exact.
This is my story. This is my journey as I turn my life (and my guts!) inside out and upside down and make it all work better.
I spent a year and a half attending Weight Watchers and tracking Points and for the first 9 months, things went great. I lost 30 pounds, 10 % of my body weight. And then I promptly started putting it back on. Eight months later I had gained back 10 of the 30 pounds and then I quit to finish planning my wedding.
My wedding was a beautiful day. I looked and felt gorgeous, my husband thought I was beautiful, and I have never felt so loved. After the wedding, I slacked off immensely, until I finally got fed up and went back to Weight Watchers. Once I got back there, I discovered I'd gained back another 10 pounds. It took me 6 weeks to lose 5 pounds.
And then one Sunday morning, sitting in my meeting (which I reall did like...good people, great leader) after having gained back 4 of those 5 pounds because of some serious stress eating, I found myself so miserable that I promptly came home and told my husband I was not dieting ny more because it makes me miserable.
And it does. Dieting makes me miserable because I'm bad at it. I know what I'm supposed to eat, I know how much I'm supposed to eat. But I'll eat the good stuf AND the bad stuff, and I have no off switch. I can gorge myself on pasta or toast or cereal or fruit or whatever it is that peaks my interest, and even when I fill sick to my stomach, I will eat that one last bite. Or five.
So this month I realized that it's time for a new tool. I need something that is going to be my off switch, something drastic. Something that will keep me from ending up in the same situation as mt mom....57 with joint problems, heart problems, cholesterol problems, blood pressure problems, etc. And so I'm going to pursue weight loss surgery, a laprascopic Roux-en-Y to be exact.
This is my story. This is my journey as I turn my life (and my guts!) inside out and upside down and make it all work better.
1 Comments:
I found your blog through Belle's post and I'm glad I stopped by. I too am just beginning my WLS journey and am still pre-op. I hope you don't mind if I come back and visit. :)
~Pam
Post a Comment
<< Home