A baby elephant!
Saturday, August 26, 2006
I have no idea how much I weigh right now. I'm assuming I'm back where I started back in 2004 when I started Weight Watchers, at the very least. 308.

That number stuns me every time I admit it to myself. 308. we have a membership at the San Diego Zoo, and we try to go at least once every few months. I have a secret game that I play with myself when we're walking around looking at the different animals. I read the signs or listen to the keepers and I make a mental note about which animals weigh less than I do. So far, I weigh more than adult giant panda, and more than a giant anteater. Seriously, how big of an ego blow is that? I weigh more than two animals with the word "giant" in their name!! But here's something even worse. If I remember correctly, I believe I weigh as much if not more than a baby elephant. Let me repeat that: I am pretty sure that I weigh more than a baby elephant.

I need to lose about 150 pounds to be in what's considered a healthy range for my height. That's a whole other person! It's rather stunning and overwhelming when I think about it that way, and quite frankly, it depresses me so I don't think about it all that often.

I've decided I need to start listing the reasons I want, need to have this surgery. I''m sure this is a list that will be added to repeatedly.
  1. I want to be able to go back to Tango Mar and not worry about fitting into the chairs at the restaurant.
  2. I want to run up the stairs at work and not be out of breath.
  3. I want to be able to spend a day on my feet without my knees hurting.
  4. I want to have a cholesterol level that makes my doctor smile.
  5. I don't want to suffer from bone spurs in my feet, arthritis in my knees and severe pain in my back the way my mother does.
  6. I don't want to have to budget for a dozen different medications to counteract the blood pressure and choleseterol and diabetes and pain that this weight will cause me.
  7. I want to sit on my husband's lap without hurting him.
  8. I want to run a half marathon with my best friend.
  9. I want to stop having acid reflux problems every time I eat something.
  10. I want to finally conquer my addiction to sugar and white flour.
Today's taste of irony: The entire time I was cruising Obesity Help this evening, I was thinking about the pint of ice cream in the fridge.

Even more ironic: As soon as I post this, I'm going to go have some.


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